blog - posted on May 29, 2024 by Rip

“Boundaries” are NOT Biblical.

(Lord, allow this to be received in Love )

*HOT TAKE* “Boundaries” are not Biblical. In fact, we’ll be hard-pressed to find any scripture in the Bible that instructs or tells us to put boundaries in place. It is a new concept that has crept its way into the church and modern psychology. And I’d go as far as saying that boundaries themselves are toxic.

So WHY are “boundaries” not Biblical? Because they are selfish and rooted in fear (the opposite of love). God’s word calls us to Love Him, Love others. Those are the greatest commands.

PLEASE HEAR MY HEART ON THIS before you allow to take over !!!

Fear (boundaries) does what’s best for self without regard for others. LOVE, on the other hand, does what’s best for others without regard for self. Love always requires a sacrifice, to put something first. If I put you first, I love you…if I put me first, I’m not loving you in that moment. Stay with me here…

If I put up a “boundary” to a toxic person and say “I won’t allow you to do XYZ to me”, we are putting up a fence that says, do not enter in. Do not harm me. So although we may be safe in our little gated circumference, the toxic person is free to roam outside it still harming themselves and others.

By doing this we just put ourselves first in an attempt to protect ourselves (fear)…but that has no regard for the other person. We couldn’t care less if they continue being toxic hurting themselves in the process. EVEN WORSE, we have no regard for our neighbors and all the other potential victims they continue to hurt in addition to themselves. All we care about is ourselves and not getting hurt. So although we may have protected ourselves in the short term, we didn’t protect them or our neighbors. That is not Love.

Love protects others. Love is Truthful (Biblically speaking.) Love IS our greatest offense AND defense. If we are following The Lord’s commands to love, we get protected in the process long before we ever have to put “boundaries” in place. If someone is toxic, love will confront them, not enable or allow their toxic behavior, nor allow them to do it to others.

Love is not what we do, it’s why behind what we do. And it’s our greatest command Biblically. Not boundaries.

We should be fighting the right fight in life: living a loving life. When we love properly, everything else takes care of itself. I know this is a hard concept to grasp because modern psychology has done a good job at wiring us ro believe “boundaries are healthy”. And it’s EXTREMELY hard to associate loving someone who is toxic and done us wrong together. I get that. But if we EVER have a problem loving someone because they did us wrong, that should be the first indication there is a heart problem. If I could forgive the man that murdered my brother and want what’s best for him without regard for myself (which would be for him to truly surrender his life to The Lord and receive eternal salvation), you could too. I promise. In the end, Love is always the answer.

Hot take complete. I truly hope you hear my heart behind this.